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First things first - it’s not for everyone and it’s certainly up to the girl to choose if she wants to try it, but for me there’s always been something…wantonly naughty about anal sex.
A few years ago I was dating a guy and it was intense. Very intense. When we were together I literally couldn’t stop touching him. And not just in a sexual way. I’d be forever just touching his arm, ruffling his hair or twirling the fuzz on his chest. There was something about him that drove me a bit bonkers.
Our relationship was not only sexually great but there was a real personality connection between the two of us. We made each other laugh like idiots and frankly I just adored being around him.
One day he came round to mine after we hadn’t seen each other for a couple of weeks. Within ten minutes of him being in my flat he’s starting to ease down my underwear. I backed away. “We can’t” I said. “I’m on my period”. He grinned “Guess we’ll have to do anal then” he chuckled.
I laughed too. I knew he was joking. I knew he had no expectation of anal sex. He never pressured me into doing anything I didn’t want to. We kept making out and we kept getting more and more aroused. We both still ended up in our underwear grinding on each other. I moved around on him and accidentally (O.K. it was kinda deliberate) felt his hardness on the entrance to my butt. I gasped and moved down on it a little.
He looked at me intently. “Do you really want…this?” He asked. I just kissed him deeply.
He reached for a condom and some lube. I laid back on the bed. We’re doing this I thought.
I wanted him inside me, but was still a little worried. He was, shall we say, on the larger side and having him in my butt was certainly going to be a challenge. It wasn’t my first time doing anal, but this was different. I was older and I was in control. With this guy I really WANTED to do it.
He moved me onto my side and started to gently thumb my clit which was a delicious distraction. Slowly and ever so gently (and with lashings of good quality lube) he started to enter me. I winced. It really fucking hurt. They say patience is a virtue and never has that been more applicable than with anal sex! He took his time and was guided by my reactions. “We can stop at any time” he said. I just whispered to him to go gently.
The pain was just about bearable and with a few ‘rest breaks’ where he stayed still inside me, some time later and with even more lube he slowly slid in a little further still. I moaned loudly and grabbed the duvet. He could tell I was now starting to (just about) enjoy it. He very, very, slowly pushed a little deeper and then moved out a fraction and then back in as I took over the clit-stroking duty (I think anal is usually a two-handed job!) I don’t know how long it went on for but it was delectable. I got a bit euphoric when I came and just lay there in a sweet post-orgasmic come down.
Afterwards he treated me like a queen. Wrapped me in the bed sheets to keep me warm, made me tea and held me close for ages.
Truth be told, I was so hot for him I wanted to do it with him anyway so there was no pressure on either of us. Some time later he moved overseas but before he did we repeated the experience on several occasions and although it always had an element of agony, it was always outweighed by the ecstasy.
If you’re keen to try anal sex here are some things to bear in mind.
1. It’s kind of grim to talk about, but it’s best if you are ‘empty’. Some people douche, some take an enema or, like me (I’m kinda regular - yay fibre!) I know my body well enough that the experience shouldn’t be a messy one. But always have a towel to hand.
2. Butt plugs. If you’re more eager in your anal adventure, then some training with these can make things more straightforward.
3. Lube. Lube. LUBE!!!! The phrase ‘too much of a good thing’ does not apply to lube during anal sex.
4. Only do it if YOU want to. It should never be about pleasing your partner. Do it for yourself and no one else.
5. Take your time. The journey to anal ecstasy is a marathon not a sprint.